Remembering Lily
by RMGryffindor
Summary: What do you do when the love of your life forgets she loves you? Based loosley on The Vow James/Lily Post-Hogwarts
1. Chapter 1

** A/N: Erm... hi guys. So, I know I should be working on 500 Days of Love and I'm sorry, but this idea came into my head and I couldn't stop thinking about it. I hit some road blocks with 500 Days of Love and I'm only about 1/3 of the way through the next chapter. I'm going to try to finish it before I leave for camp in NYC which is on the 15th so look out for that. ANYWHO, this story is an amnesia story based off Harry Evans and The Vow, neither of which I am claiming to own. Please enjoy (: I'm guessing this will be a pretty short story, with about five chapters, but we'll see. I might decide I want to make it longer or shorter. These updates will hopefully come pretty fast seeing as the idea is fresh in my brain and I haven't hit writers block yet.**

**EDIT: Oh my god, guys if you read this before I changed the Potter/Evans names confusion I'm so sorry I put you through that. It's fixed now.**

* * *

"Hey, Lils," greeted James happily as he entered the room. He bent down to place a light kiss on Lily's cheek before pulling up a chair next to her and beaming.

"Oh Merlin, Lily, I can't wait to tell you what happened today. So I was talking to Padfoot and…" He went on and on, excitedly blabbering about his new plan to set Peter up on a date with a girl he met on the tube and how lunch with Moony had went and so on. He squeezed her hand as he talked, waiting for any constraint or relief from her fingers, though he found none.

After about thirty minutes of the one sided, non-stop chatter, the door banged open and in waddled a heavy-set doctor. "Well, hello Mr. Potter. How are you today?"

"I had a wonderful day," replied James, "I was just telling Lily about it." He turned back to Lily to flash a smile at her shut eyes.

Doctor Clarke Edwards, a muggle doctor of over thirty years, did not ask if there was any response from Lily. He knew all to well what James's answer would be. Instead, he responded with a simple grunt and nod of his head.

The lights overhead flickered a bit, their fluorescent glow adding to the greenish tint of Lily's skin. James quirked one eyebrow at the doctor when he stayed put in the room, tapping his pen on his clipboard while he stared noncommittally at the flashing bulb.

"Is there something I can do for you, Doctor Clarke?"

Snapping at of his reverie, Doctor Clarke said, "If I may just speak with you out in the hallway for just a moment."

James nodded and followed him out, though he was unsure why they had to do it outside of the room. It wasn't like Lily could really hear them when they talked in front of her.

"Mr. Potter…" started Doctor Clarke.

"You can call me James."

"James… I think we need to talk about the possibility of your girlfriend not waking up."

James squinted his eyes, confused at the sentiment. "What do you mean? Of course she's going to wake up, she just needs some more time."

"It's been two months, James. I don't think she's going to wake up."

James stood with a dumbfounded expression, mouth slightly agape, as he heard the words leave Doctor Clarke's mouth. "No, of course she is. Why wouldn't she? She's just… she's still just recovering. Please, Edwards, just give her some more time."

"I'm sorry Mr. Potter, but Lily's parents have stated that she wouldn't have wanted this. She would have wanted them to pull the plug if the possibility of her waking up looked this bleak. James, please listen when I say even if she did wake up, we don't know what her mental state would be. She might not be able to walk or talk, let alone remember who you are."

"Please," gasped James, who was choking on the tears streaming from his eyes. "Please, just give her more time."

"I'm sorry, Mr. Potter, we can give a day to say goodbye."

Not able to hold his own for one second longer, James collapsed onto the ground and against the wall, sobbing. He ran his tear stained fingers through his hair and yanked at it, hoping this was some kind of twisted dream. They were only eighteen years old. They were only eighteen.

The sound of footsteps faded as Doctor Clarke left, James a sobbing mess on the cold floor of the hospital. He wouldn't let them do this. He couldn't.

Lily had to wake up and soon.

* * *

"Hey, love, I've gotta go up to the Prophet, some nutjob screwed up the bloody headline. Again."

Lily rolled her eyes at James and kissed him on the cheek, handing him a cup of coffee as he rushed around their tiny flat, grabbing things he needed for work.

"Bye, I love you!" called Lily, before the door slammed shut and James was making his way down the many stairs of their apartment building, finally bursting out onto the warm streets in London on a early September day.

James couldn't believe it had happened again. For Merlin's sake, how did Slyfield mess up the headlines for a second time this week? He had one job and James was the one who had to do it.

Sometimes, James didn't even know why he stayed with the Daily Prophet. He'd worked there part time for about four months, ever since he left Hogwarts, and it had practically turned into a full time job. With the Prophet along with the Order, he was swamped with work.

It was about two o'clock that day, as James sat in his office with Slyfield, finally finished correcting the paper's when he heard the tapping of an owl on the window. He scurried over to it and slide it open, grabbing the letter from the owl and slowly unfolding it to read the message.

Only a moment later, James dropped the letter on the ground and mumbled out a cracked, "I've got to go," before running out of his office and the headquarters of the Prophet and into the streets of Diagon Alley, before disapparating on the spot.

When he arrived at the muggle hospital, the one that Lily's parents had told him in their letter, he rushed through the doors and immediately found her sobbing family in the lobby, all clutching one another closely.

"Oh James," cried her mother, who hopped up from her seat and enveloped James in a hug. Her slender arms wrapped around him and he could smell the flowery perfume on her that Lily loved to wear.

In that moment, James realized he had been crying his entire way over, salty tears streaming down his face and dripping onto his robes. He didn't have the energy to pull them off, choosing to stay in them even if muggles might get suspicious.

"What happened?"

Her father then rose from his seat behind them, leaving Petunia still sitting with her head in her hands.

"She was on her way to work, at that coffee shop she works at, when she was hit by an automobile."

"She was hit by one of those car things?" he muttered. "I always told her to be careful around those things, I told her they were dangerous. Merlin, Lily."

Her mother finally let him go and he took a step back, to survey the situation. "Where is she now?"

"She's in surgery now, they are doing the best they can. She hit her head really bad."

James just nodded and took a seat next to Petunia. Mascara was running down her face, along with eye liner, and her hair was a mess. She wasn't the put together person she normally was. She didn't say a word, rather choosing to tilt her head against James shoulder. He threw an arm around her shoulders and pulled her against him, letting her tears soak his chest.

* * *

"We need to get a healer," cried James, "We need to get a healer, maybe they can do something!"

"Prongs," replied Sirius, cautiously, "You tried that before, when she got out of surgery and they said they couldn't do anything more that the muggles had already done. I'm sorry, mate."

James and Sirius sat by Lily's bedside, watching her slow intake of breath, helped by the many machines attached to her. Sirius was holding her hand, slowly rubbing circles into her palm as James sat dejectedly by him, refusing to touch Lily.

At that moment, Mrs. and Mr. Evans walked into the room, holding hand, with matching deep circles under their eyes. Mrs. Evans's red hair was pulled up into a tight bun, though a few loose strands hung in her face. James stood up when they entered, glaring steadily at them.

"James, honey, you have to understand—" started her mother, though she was cut off by James.

"No, I damn well don't. How can you do this to her? She's going to wake up, how can you do this to your daughter?"

"James, she's not going to wake up."

"Of course she is! You can't do this, this isn't your decision to make!"

Her father stepped up now, a large man with graying hair and thin glasses. "You're damn right this isn't our decision. But it's not yours either. This is Lily's decision, whether she wants to be kept on life support, and she doesn't. She made that clear to us years ago."

James wanted to fall to his knees, wanted to beg them not to, but there was no changing their minds now.

"Now if you would James, please give us a moment alone with our daughter."

James watched them talk to her through the glass, though he couldn't hear what they were saying. He watched the way their mouths formed words, watched their tears flow heavily. Petunia entered next, speaking quietly and shortly to her sister who didn't seem to comprehend a word.

A group of people gathered outside the room, from her friends like the Marauders and Alice, to her family, like cousins and grandparents. James watched as one by one, they went into to say their goodbyes.

James would be last, with Alice before him. Before Alice went in Lily's room, she walked up to James and gave him a hug, holding on tightly to the back of his shirt.

"I love you. I'm so sorry you have to go through this," she whispered into her ear.

"Love you, too, Alice." She gave him a peck on the cheek before entering the room and James watched as she broke down in front of Lily. He knew he couldn't watch any longer, so he pulled the blinds shut, burying his head in his hands instead

After about five minutes, the door banged open, with Alice standing out of breath at the doorway.

She could only choke out two breathless words.

"She's awake."

* * *

"She's asking for her parents," Alice continued, seeking out the familiar faces of Mrs. and Mr. Evans. James stood still, dumbfounded at the new information.

Mrs. Evans had her head in her hands and was silently crying, while Mr. Evans was tugging her along by the elbow to the room. Again, James just stood by the doorway, mouth agape.

"Come on, James," beckoned Mr. Evans when they reached the door. James nodded and trailed behind them in the room, tears falling from his eyes when he saw Lily sitting up blearily.

A team of doctors rushed in behind them and practically shoved the three out of the way to get to Lily. All at once there was an uproar from the five doctors before they all grew silent and Dr. Clarke emerged from the group in front of Lily.

"Miss Evans, can you hear me?"

James watched from the side of her bed as she slowly nodded before coughing loudly, the noise echoing through the room.

She opened her mouth to speak but once again was sent into a coughing fit. Finally, she was able to croak out, "Where's my mum and dad?"

"Right here, Sweetie!" called her mother, shoving through the doctors to grasp at her daughter's hand.

"What happened?"

"Hon, do you remember? You were in a car accident?'

"Car accident? How did a… how did a car get into Hogwarts?"

Her mother's eyes widened and she looked from James to the doctors and back to Lily, expression interlaced with fear.

"Sweetheart, you were on your way to work."

"Work?"

"At the Corner Café."

Lily tried to lift her hands, maybe to bury her face in them James assumed, but was caught on the wires.

Dr. Clarke stepped up to survey Lily and asked, "Lily, I'm your doctor, Dr. Clarke. Can you tell me what year is it?"

"'Course, it's 1976." No. Would Lily not remember him? Would she not remember him as her boyfriend? Did she still hate him?

"Lily, can you identify this man and his relationship with you?"

Dr. Clarke stepped to the side to reveal James, who nervously ran a hand through his hair and smiled lightly, laughing a bit.

"That's Potter… James Potter. I go to school with him. We… well we were enemies for a bit… Wait, Potter, what are you doing here?"

"Erm…" he started off, not sure what to say, but feeling queasy as hell.

"Mom, why is Potter here? Who let him in?"

Mr. Evans piped up from the back now, laying a hand on James shoulder as he said, "Son, maybe this would be a bit easier if you let us speak to Lily privately.

"No, I have to stay here. She has to remember me!"

"She does remember you…" trailed off Mrs. Evans.

"Remember what?" cried Lily.

"But she doesn't remember _me_. She doesn't even know I'm here bloody boyfriend!"

"WHAT!"

"Please, James, listen to me, I'm her father and—"

"No, James, I'm her mother and I think it would be best if—"

"All of you, Lily needs to rest and this fighting isn't helping—"

"IF SOMEBODY TELL ME WHEN THE _HELL _IS GOING ON, I SWEAR TO MERLIN I WILL THROW MYSELF OUT THE BLOODY WINDOW!"

The four who had turned away from Lily while they bickered all whipped around to see her looking red in the face, breathing heavy from her screaming.

"James, please…" said Mr. Evans.

James felt tears prickle at his eyes once more and he breathed out an angry, "Fine," before stomping out of the room and slamming the door.

As soon as he left, he was surrounded by angst-ridden people, asking how she was doing. They backed off when Alice screamed, "Can't you see he doesn't want to talk!"

James was never more thankful for Alice's ability to calm a crowd.

* * *

"Hey… Lily," James said softly, running his fingers through his hair and adjusting his glasses as he walked through the doorway to her room. Since three hours prior, things had calmed down quite a bit. After multiple examinations by her doctors and a long chat with her parents, James was finally allowed in her room to see her.

Her red hair was sticky with sweat, pulled off the nape of her neck with an elastic, and her cheeks were returning to their rosy red color.

"Hi," she replied quietly, not quite meeting his eyes. He walked over and pulled a chair up next to her, making sure not to grab her hand like he so wanted to.

"So… what have your parents told you?"

"They told me that it's 1978 and that I'm eighteen years old. They told me I work at a coffee shop, which means my plans after school must have fallen to shite. They told me that Alice is still my best friend and Petunia is married now. She's _married_. I'm still getting used to that one."

"And… me?"

She took a deep breath. "They told me that you are my… I guess they said you were my boyfriend. They said my feelings changed for you in seventh year when we were head's together. Did Dumbledore go batshit crazy in sixth year and I just don't remember it?"

James chuckled, surprised she wasn't screaming at him at this point. "Nah, he was always pretty insane. It just showed more when he gave me a position of authority."

Lily giggled along with him, before a look of confusion and slight annoyance flashed across her face.

"You didn't make some cocky joke about how much you deserved it or how the badge you got impressed all the ladies."

"I'm glad to see your ears are working, Miss Evans."

Lily's smile grew to disdain. "Oh here we go, cracking jokes right after I left a coma. Great job, Potter." Lily crossed her arms across her chest and turned slightly away from him.

"No, Lils, please don't do this," he begged, reaching up to tug her arms uncrossed before stopping himself. He silently reprimanded his body, knowing he couldn't just touch her whenever he wanted.

"Don't call me Lils," she retorted haughtily.

James rubbed his temples. "I'm sorry. Please, I really am. I'm not… I'm not meaning to make you angry or annoy you. This is all very strange for me."

"Well picture how I feel!" she exploded. "I wake up thinking we are back in sixth year, with you ignoring me and every once in awhile making cracks at my expense, only to find out that I'm actually your_ girlfriend_. Everyone's telling me all these different things and I just can't handle this right now."

"Just tell me what I can do."

"Just… leave. Just leave, Potter," she spat, closing her eyes and scrunching up her face.

"Lils—Lily, please don't do this."

"I'll talk to you later. But for now, I just need to be alone."

James stood up dejectedly and exited the room, feeling more alone than ever.

* * *

If Lily had woken up still thinking it was fifth year, that would have been awful. But Lily waking up thinking it was sixth year? Even worse.

After asking Lily out almost everyday for a year straight, James had arrived back at Hogwarts for sixth year with a plan. He arrived with a plan to once and for all escape the trap that was Lily Evans. And he did just that.

For an entire year, he ignored her, refusing to even say hi when passing in a corridor. No eye contact, no physical contact, no verbal contact. Every once in a while, he'd make a joke about her small stature or red hair to the Marauders when he knew she was listening.

Lily grew to hate him even more that year. In seventh, they made a truce and slowly became friends and out of that, sprung love. James, who had never really gotten over Lily, just buried his feelings, and Lily, who had grown more and more fond of him everyday it had seemed.

Lily had later confessed to him that his silence during sixth year hurt her more than she could ever really admit, for she had harbored a small crush on James through the years that she surprised because of his arrogant attitude and magnified interest in mischief.

"She asked me to leave," James said when he leaves, Alice the only one left outside her room. He pattered over to one of the grey chairs and collapsed in it, the day not only physically but also mentally and emotionally exhausting.

"James," she said softly, walking over to him and sitting gently into the chair next to him. She placed her arm around his waist and curled into him, nuzzling her neck at the junction in his neck and shoulder.

He gave in after a minute and places his head on top of hers, wrapping one strong arm around her body and pulling him into her. They sat there like that for minutes, just cuddling in the hospital waiting room.

James kissed her head and then her cheek before pulling her into a big, sloppy hug. "Thank you, Alice, that's just what I needed."

"Of course, James," she replied, giving him one last squeeze before untangling herself from him and standing up. "I'm going to go say hi, give her a familiar face. You need to go home and sleep. I'll owl you if anything changes, I think I'll stay here tonight."

Upon glancing at his watch, he was surprised to fine it almost ten o'clock. He nodded at her wishes, knowing he was too tired to argue, before giving her a shoulder squeeze and exiting the hospital.

That night, when he went to sleep in his cold bed, he dreamed of freckled arms holding him tight and warm legs tangled with him. He woke up to an empty bed and sweat gathered on his brow, the air conditioner still broken.

Some things never change.

* * *

James hopped out of bed at eight and slipped on his nicest button up shirt and matching belt and shoes. He quickly got ready and was out in just a half an hour, swiftly making his way to the hospital. When he arrived, flowers in hand, he gently tapped on the door of Lily's room, seeing she was awake through the glass panel.

"Come in," she called.

When he entered, he found Alice was curled up in a ball in a chair in the corner, snoozing quietly. She awoke to the sound of the door opening and jolted awake, rubbing her eyes groggily and muttering something under her breath.

"Hey James," she greeted when she saw him. "I'll leave you two alone, give me a minute. James turned to Lily, seeing her start to protest, before dropping her hands to her lap and crossing her arms.

"Here," James said, plucking a flower from the bouquet he was holding to present it to Alice. "For you."

Alice grabbed it from his outstretched hand and smiled brightly. "Oh James, how you make me swoon."

"You know that's always my goal."

She giggled and flounced over to peck him on the cheek in thanks before fluttering out. "See ya, Lily!" she called out behind her.

"It's like I wasn't even here," chuckled Lily, though there was some malice in her voice. "Are you two… particularly close?"

James bobbed his head. "Yeah, you really brought us together. We usually go on bi-weekly coffee dates, started even before your… erm… accident."

"Dates?"

"Meet-ups, hang-outs, dates, all the same thing."

"Mmm."

James coughed before extending his hand to present the flowers. "For you."

"Oh, um… thanks, I reckon."

"I can grab a glass of water to put them in. I should have thought of that, erm…" James tripped around a bit, stumbling to find somewhere to put them.

"Here, just set them on the bedside table. I'll have one of the nurses bring in a glass."

"Right," James replied, doing as Lily said before scooting up a chair next to her. "Right so…"

"I was wondering…"

"Wait, what?" James asked.

"Nothing, you can go first."

"No, what were you wondering?"

"Oh… erm… well, Alice kinda… filled me in on everything that's happened that my parents didn't know. Abridged version, of course. She told me how I was head girl and that I got almost perfect scores on my NEWTs. She told me that I wanted to work as an Auror, but the Ministry isn't hiring muggleborns. She said that I'm in the Order and that the war as escalated a lot since I last remember. Alice told me I'm pretty good friends with your gang now, too."

"Yeah, you, Peter, and Remus go out to lunch every other week and Sirius practically lives at our flat. Well, you _did_ go out to lunch every week and he used to live at our flat."

"Sirius doesn't come over as often anymore?" Lily asked.

"No… well, once I stopped living at my house, choosing to basically live at the hospital, there was no point of him being there."

"Our flat," Lily breathed out, like a delayed reaction to James's words.

"We bought it right out of school, with my parents money. I don't really like accepting it, to be honest, but it helped us get a place. Though it is small and the air conditioner has been broken from the day we moved in, it works for us. It—worked for us."

"Right, so I was wondering if you could maybe… fill me in on how we got together. Last I remember was… I think it was around Easter holiday of sixth year. From what I remember, you never said a word to me. I assumed you had moved on, that you hated me."

James took a deep breath, letting his lungs fill with the stale air of the sterile room. "Sirius and I, in sixth year, concocted a plan to get over you. We called it _How to Get Over Lily Evans in 365 Days_. Well… the plan was pretty simple, actually. I had to completely ignore you. So, obviously, I did. The entire year, it killed me every time I saw you because all I wanted to do was be your friend. All I wanted to do was somehow be apart of you life.

"So, once seventh year rolled around, I'd realized what a stupid plan that had been from the first day I saw you on the train, with your badge and your hair pulled back into one of those twisty bun things and your knee high socks."

Lily laughed. "You remember how I did my hair."

It didn't need an answer, because it was a simple statement. "So a new plan was concocted, though this time I went to Remus for help. I stopped picking on first years and I didn't hex Slytherins… much. And I was your friend, first and for most. And slowly, from there… it just kind of happened."

"But I _hated _you!"

"Nah, you didn't."

Lily scrunched up her face. "Yes, I did. I despised you. Why would I agree to be your friend?"

James was still, unsure whether he should reveal to her that he knew she had always had a tiny crush on him. Deciding against it, he responded, "You warmed up to me after I while. I think you realized that I had changed and wasn't the same bully I was in fifth year."

"Wow, Potter, I guess you really did get what you always wanted."

James coughed. "Hey, Lily?"

"Mm?"

"Do you think that you could maybe call me James?"

Lily looked up to meet his eyes. "Sure, sure. I can try… sorry, it's sort of a habit."

"No, I get it. I'm sure it's weird having me call you Lily."

"Weirder when you called me Lils."

"Right," James laughed awkwardly, "I'll make sure not to do that again."

Another silent moment. "Are there," Lily said, looking nervous, "any other nicknames you have for me?"

"Oh, yeah." Lily looked at him expectantly. "Well, there's Lils and… um… love."

"Love?"

"Yeah, sometimes I call you love."

"So we… you know… said I love you?"

James laughed. "Yes, about two months after we started dating."

Lily nodded before widening her eyes and taking a gulp of air. "And did we… do it?"

James had to stop himself from laughing again. "Night before the end of seventh year, we shagged."

Lily winced at the words, turning bright pink.

"Any others?"

"Yeah, we did it plenty of times after that."

"No, I mean, any other nicknames?"

James blushed red.

"Sometimes I call you sweetheart or honey, usually when you're sick or feeling down."

Lily bit her lip and mumbled, "Let's just stick with Lily for now, okay?"

James nodded, agreeing. He had a big, stupid grin at his face when he heard the 'for now'. Maybe there was hope for them after all.

* * *

**A/N: Sorry for any grammatical errors, I'm lazy. If you see any, though, just tell me and I'll go back and fix them. Anyway, I would love your feedback. Reviews really motivate me to write faster, hint hint. All my chapters are sorted into parts and once I finish the parts, I post them on tumblr. If you want to read parts of the chapter before it's finished, you can track the tag Remembering Lily or find me at staganddoe and look under the 'drabble' tab on my page. Thanks so much for reading and if you favorite or alert, I would love for you just to submit one review!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Oh my god, guys. I want to apologize so much. Like, I'm really embarrassed right now that anyone read that last chapter. It was like 2 a.m. when I wrote it and I didn't edit it and the mistake I made was awful. I put Mr. and Mrs. Potter instead of Mr. and Mrs. Evans. I did a Find/Replace and changed it back before I realized that would change all of James Potter's names to James Evans and ugh. If you caught that awful mistake last time and told me, thank you so much, I'm surprised anyone actually read this without flaming because it's such a stupid mistake. So please, forgive me in trade for this chapter being written and published so quickly. I'm really not that stupid that I don't know Lily's maiden name. **

* * *

"James!" called Dr. Clarke as James was exiting Lily's room, ready to go meet Alice for coffee. "How are you adjusting?"

"I'm… I'm doing just that. I think you should be more worried about Lily."

Dr. Clarke smiled grandly. "That's the thing, James. Her recovery has been pretty amazing so far. According to one of the nurses and what I've seen, all Lily's motor skills seem to be working perfectly. Her speech, her hearing, everything is working perfectly. It's a miracle."

James narrowed his eyes. "Everything is working perfectly… except her memory."

"Oh yes… that." Dr. Clarke now looked nervous. "We are hoping that it's just a temporary thing. Once she is surrounded by familiar settings, like your flat and your local hangouts, she should regain her memories fairly soon."

"And if she doesn't?" James asked, slightly panicked.

"We'll cross that bridge when we get there."

"When?"

"I meant if. James, I know you aren't too happy about this situation, but please remember how surprising this situation is, that anything is as good as it is; your girlfriend was about to be taken off life support when she woke up. To the medical world, this is a phenomenon."

James wanted to slam his head against the wall. "You're right. Merlin, of course you are right. I'm so thankful for what has happened, I truly am. I guess it's just hard to see past the road blocks, no matter how far she's come."

"Please, James, just take a deep breath, this is all understandable. Most would not be able to handle this situation with the same amount of dedication or perception."

"Thank you, Dr. Clarke. Truly, thank you for all that you've done."

"All in a days work, Mr. Potter."

"So, I told her about my nicknames for her, you know—like love and sweetheart, and she said to stick with Lily."

"Okay…?"

"Stick with Lily _for now_. Meaning maybe she'll let me call her them after awhile, meaning she's open to letting me stay in her life."

Alice smiled at James's happiness. "You sure are optimistic."

"At first," James started, "it was crushing. But don't you see, Alice? I get to make her fall in love with me again! And since she's already done it once, it'll be that much easier for me."

"I'm happy you're happy, James," Alice replied, placing a hand atop his as she sipped her coffee. "Also, I have some more good news." James nodded, asking her to go on. "Well, when I went to talk to Lily last night, she had a few choice questions."

"Mhm."

"I know my best friend, James, and I know when she's jealous."

James perked up. "Yes?"

"She was very concerned with _our_ relationship."

"She thinks there's something going on between us?" Both burst out laughing and meet each other's eyes, laughing once more even harder.

"That's what it seems."

"That's barmy!"

"I know it better than anyone else," Alice said. "But yes, she asked a bunch of questions about it. I assured her that in the past few months, you had been completely faithful to her."

"I appreciate it."

"But, just to be sure, maybe we should stop with the kisses and the hugs and the cuddling."

"But I like the cuddling," pouted James.

"Your such a baby!"

"Bugger off. Anyway, I say we do the opposite. I say we try and make her jealous."

Alice rolled her eyes. "James, do you remember who your girlfriend is? Lily doesn't like games, she never did."

"Right," James surrendered, groaning loudly.

Just then, the door to the café swung open and Bea, the owner of the shop and Lily's boss entered. James stood up and approached her.

Bea was someone Lily respected greatly and was a frequent dinner guest at their flat before the accident. She treated Lily like a daughter, giving her advice and treating her to maternal shopping trips. Bea had also taken a great liking to James. When she found out about the accident, she closed the shop for a day just to go see Lily.

Bea's eyes widened in fear as James walked nearer.

"Did something happen?"

"She's awake," murmured James, before he was wrapped in a hug by Bea, who was laughing and crying tears of joy.

"Oh, thank the lord," she mumbled into James's shoulder, her slender and fragile arms wrapped around his neck. "Oh, now I must go in see her!" She pulled away.

"That's the thing, Bea…" said James, unsure how to phrase it. "She's got a bit of a problem… with amnesia. She can't remember the past few years."

"And she can't remember me," replied Bea.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry for something that's not your fault."

"Still."

"Well, when she comes home, just bring her around here and you can introduce me again. She charmed the pants off of me the first time I met her, I don't doubt she will do it again."

After James finished addressing a letter to his parents and sending it with Earl, his owl, he heard a knock on his door. He stood up and swung it open to find Sirius, Remus, and Peter at the frame, holding various bottles of alcohol.

"Come on, buddy, we're going to go celebrate," cried Peter giddily, holding up a flask of an unknown subject.

"Mates, it's been a long day and—"

"We won't take no for an answer!"

"Fine," grumbled James. To be honest, he just wanted to get back to the hospital, but Lily's family had wanted to spend a day with her and he couldn't barge in on that kind of occasion.

They all filed into his flat and brought out the glasses, taking shots of whatever was in Peter's mysterious flask. In only an hour, James's world was spinning.

"To Lily!" toasted Sirius.

"That's the third time we've toasted to Lily," Remus pointed out.

"So what, that's what we are celebrating! James can finally get a good shag. I'm sure it's been rough, mate, after two months."

James laughed loudly, throwing his head back and skewing his glasses.

"To Lily!" they all shouted.

James woke up the next morning with a pounding head. He groaned and turned to the side, burying his head in the pillow. After his mates left late last night, Remus sober enough to drag the other two home, James crashed in his bed.

James grappled to his nightstand and grabbed a glass of water he has left the night before. He then stood up and stumbled to the bathroom, grabbing an aspirin from the medicine cabinet and throwing it back. He glanced at the clock with blurred vision.

"Shit," he muttered, before tripping back into his room and quickly climbing into the first clothes at arms reach. He snatched his glasses from the bedside table and slid them on, before his hands went to his hair. It felt more unruly then normal, but he couldn't bother with it, he didn't have time.

Today, he was supposed to meet with Lily, her parents, and Dr. Clarke to discuss when she would be emitted from the hospital and where. He had about five minutes to get there.

He forwent breakfast and apparated from right there in his apartment to a back alleyway by the medical center. Sprinting towards the doors, he threw one open and made his way to the fifth floor, where Lily was staying.

James meant it with a minute to spare, opening up her door to find both her parents and Dr. Clarke discussing something quietly to each other.

"You're late," piped up Lily, who was sitting in a chair next to her mother. James was surprised to see her not propped up in the bed.

"I thought we said ten?"

"It's ten o'one."

"Well sorry," he apologized, "The boys came over last night and I got a late start this morning."

"No matter," said Mrs. Evans. "Please, darling, just sit down."

James side eyed her a bit, wondering why she was treating him like glass. His answer came once he took a seat.

"James, we're thinking Lily should come home with us," said Mr. Evans.

"What?" cried James, gripping the arms of the seat until his knuckles turned white.

"We've talked to Dr. Clarke about it and we want Lily where she feels safest. He says she could take trips over to your apartment, try to jog her memory or something. You could also come and visit her at our house. We just don't think it's practical for you to try and pick up where you left off with Lily."

"Are you insinuating I would do something Lily isn't comfortable with?" James couldn't believe this. Like he would ever force Lily to do something she didn't want to.

Dr. Clarke said, "James, we know you are having a hard time adjusting and sometimes the pressure becomes to much."

"I respect Lily more than anyone in the world! How dare you think I could do anything to hurt her. She's the love of my life, and even though she may not remember it, _I do_."

"He wouldn't hurt me." Every head swiveled to face Lily, who piped up softly from the back. "Pott—James would never do anything to hurt me, I know that."

James gaped at her words.

Her mother laid a hand on her shoulder and murmured, "Sweetie, we know how good of a man James is but sometimes… well, Lily, he's in love with you and love makes people do crazy things."

"I'm right here," James reminded her mother with a roll of his eyes.

"He was in love with me for two years before we started going out, I think I know love struck-James well enough by now. And maybe before any of you decide what you think I want, try _asking_ me what I want."

No one had an answer for her because no one _had _asked her what she wanted. James found that quite absurd, that no one had even tried.

"What do you want, Lily?" asked Doctor Clarke.

"I want…" she paused. "I want to go back to the life I had before. Mum, Dad, I love you guys but I need to regain the memories I lost if I ever want my life to return to normal. While yes, I don't know how in the hell I ended up living with James Potter of all people, I do know that I fell in love with him before. I owe him that much to try and remember how I did it."

James removed his glasses and placed his cool hands on his face while simultaneously thanking Merlin. She was giving him a chance! Lily would give him a chance to prove their love to her. She was going to remember, _she had to_, but in the meantime, this was the best he could do.

"Lily, are you sure? You would be so much more comfortable at home and—"

"_Yes,_ Mum, I'm sure."

"Okay, then it's decided. We can discharge you today and you can go home with James."

It sunk in then, really, that Lily would come home with him. Not his Lily, but sixth year Lily nonetheless. And that was better than nothing.

Right?

"Okay, here we are," said James, as he led Lily into their apartment. He held his breath, waiting for her reaction, hoping that the sight would be the thing to trigger her memory. He could feel Lily holding hers too, hoping for the same.

"Well it's…" she trailed off, "… cozy." James dropped his head.

James glanced back at her where she was grasping the straps of her duffel bag, filled with clothes James had brought to her. "Yeah, I know it's small. There are only three rooms."

Lily gaped. "Um, okay. Well, uh… show me around then Pott—James."

James flinched at her second attempt to cover up the use of his surname.

"So, this is the living room," he said lamely, holding out his arms in a 'voila' fashion as he presented the room. It was small, with an ancient, floral couch pushed up against one wall, side tables next to those, and a comfy recliner in the corner. The room was decorated with various pieces of art and other things.

"It's homey," Lily attempted at a compliment. "Is that… is that my aunt's furniture?"

"Yeah she left it to you… oh Merlin, did she…?"

"Oh yeah, no, I remember, she passed away in fifth year."

James breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank Merlin, I didn't know how I was going to explain that if… yeah."

"There weren't any… erm… other deaths that I might have forgotten?"

James gulped. There was one.

Lily sensed James apprehension. "Who was it? Was it my gran? Oh, lord, please tell me it wasn't my gran."

"No, no," James said. "Just… sit down?"

Lily did so, placing herself gently on the recliner as James sat on the couch, hands clasped.

"So… Lily, I think I first need to explain to you how escalated the war has gotten."

"Alice explained—"

"Well let me explain again." He waited for Lily's nod and when it came, he continued. "So, you remember in sixth year, things had gotten pretty bad. Slytherins were more divided from the other houses than ever, because there were many that were tampering with dark arts and joining the Death Eaters."

"Yes, I remember all that."

"Well, as you know, the Death Eaters follow Voldemort, though he wasn't very much in power a few years back. As Alice told you, we are in the Order of the Phoenix, a group of highly trained and powerful witches and wizards who are trying to stop Voldemort. It's a very dangerous job."

Lily nodded. James continued, "I think… I think one of the things that brought us together was our fierce love for justice. We both wanted to try and keep those around us safe. The prejudice against muggle-borns has grown ten fold since you remember. In seventh year… there were attacks, against muggle-borns. Nothing too serious, mostly just empty threats and a few scratches. It was all fun and games for them… until someone died."

Lily clasped a hand over her mouth, choking back a sob. "In seventh year, a few months before we graduated, there was a murder at Hogwarts. It was… it was quite shaking, to the entire school. It was like a warning, from the Death Eaters inside Hogwarts. Like, if you cross us, this is what will happen."

"Oh Merlin, who was it?" cried Lily, now silently sobbing in her hands. James wanted nothing to do but wrap her in his arms and whisper soothing words into her ear, but he restrained himself.

"Lily, it wasn't a muggle-born…. It was a blood traitor."

Lily's head snapped up, her eyes bloodshot, as she mumbled out, "No, Merin no. Please."

"Lily, I'm so sorry. It was Mary MacDonald." Mary was Lily's fellow Gryffindor, in the same year as them.

Lily burst into tears then, loud, sobbing tears as she shook in her seat. James placed a hand on her knee, hoping to give her some sort of comfort, but she jerked away.

"It shook you to your core, both of us really. That's when we decided to move in together and join the Order. We knew we couldn't just sit around." Lily just shook her head, her red hair fanning around her face and soaking with tears.

"Who did it?" she asked suddenly, her voice growing with malice. "Who did it? I swear, I will kill them."

"Mulciber was suspected, but it was never proved. Dumbledore did all he could to keep an eye on them, but it just wasn't enough."

There was a silence that hung in the air, heavy and thick."I want to go to bed."

"Okay. Okay, yeah, sure. Just… come on," he motioned, gently gripping her arm as he guided her to the bedroom.

He led her to their room and entered the bathroom while she changed, brushing his teeth and deciding to take a shower in the morning.

When he walked back out, he saw Lily standing apprehensively by the bed, toying with the comforter.

"I'm going to sleep out on the couch," he said, grabbing a blanket from the linen closet and a pillow from the bed.

Lily didn't argue.

As James walked through the doorway, Lily called out after him.

"She was in love with you, ya know?"

"Who?"

"Mary."

A pregnant pause filled the silence. Lily spoke again. "She was always quite jealous of me, I believe. I could never understand why. Maybe… maybe if you had been with her, it wouldn't have happened. Maybe if I hadn't stolen you away from her, she wouldn't be dead."

"Maybe. But Lily, you can't blame yourself for this. You didn't do anything wrong, you could have never predicted this."

Lily sat in the bed and slowly nodded. "Yeah, yeah I guess you are right."

"Goodnight Lily. I love… Look, I… I just love you, okay? I'm sorry if that makes you feel weird."

"Yeah, it makes me feel weird. The good kind of weird, though. Goodnight, James."

And with that, he turned off the light.

"Mornin' Lily," greeted James when Lily blearily stumbled out into the kitchen the next morning. She rubbed her eyes with the tips of her fingers and collapsed in one of the kitchen chairs, as well as shielded her eyes from the light.

"Hey, Potter," she replied. James cringed at the name but didn't correct her, seeing as she didn't even notice what she said.

"Want some pancakes?" he asked.

"Mm, yeah sure." She smacked her lips. James swallowed, the air suddenly feeling ten times hotter around him as he took in her disheveled appearance and barely clad body. She was in a tank top and shorts.

James grabbed a plate and flipped some pancakes onto it, before drizzling syrup over them.

"Here you are," he presented, turning away from the stove and towards Lily as he placed them on the table in front of her.

Her eyes widened when she looked at him, her stare raking over his disorderly hair and glasses-clad face. They then lowered to stare at the vast expanse of his chest. His very _naked_ chest, James then realized.

Mistaking her stare for distress, he quickly crossed his arms. "Shit, Lils, I'm sorry. Crap, I mean Lily. I didn't even realize," he stuttered aimlessly, before crossing over the threshold into living room and grabbing his shirt. He pulled it over his head before walking back into the kitchen, where Lily was still gawking.

"Sorry about that, Lily. Force of habit, I guess."

Lily blushed a deep red before diving into her meal, refusing to meet his eyes for the next few minutes. He only then realized that what he had sensed before wasn't distress, but maybe _attraction_. Well, he knew one thing for sure.

James could definitely use that to his advantage.

"So… what do we usually do?" Lily asked once they had both finished breakfast.

"I guess it depends on the day. Before the…erm… accident, I worked part time at the Prophet and you worked part time at the coffee shop. If we weren't working, we'd be working on plans for the Order, or even on missions. If we weren't doing either… well, you would work on your art and I'd do some personal writing. Stuff that's not for work, I mean."

Lily nodded, mulling over the information. "Are you still with the Prophet?"

James shook his head. "Nah, I couldn't do it with you in the hospital. I started using some of the money my parents saved up for me for rent because as much as I love the Order, it doesn't pay a knut."

"So should I just… work on my art today? Try to get back into the swing of things?"

"I think it'd be best to start that tomorrow. The Marauders have been dying to see you…"

A look of unease grew on Lily's face at the mention of his mates.

"But I mean, if you don't want to, we can just hang around. Anything you want to do, really."

Lily shook her head, reassuring him, "No, I'd love to see them… just remind them that I don't know them as well as they know me."

"Of course. I've already talked to them about it but I'll make sure to tell them again if it makes you feel more comfortable."

"Thanks James," she said with a smile. "Seriously… thank you for everything. You've been the most understanding, of anyone, though you would be the one I would have predicted to have been the least. I can't imagine… I can't imagine falling in love with someone and starting a life with them just to have it ripped from your hands.

"While I was resentful at first, just in the small actions you do now show me how much you matured and aged and I'm sad to see I missed the transformation in action. So… thank you."

James bobbed his head, looking at the table. Merlin, she was beautiful. Really, really beautiful. He missed his girlfriend, the one who would kiss him on the cheek when she got home from work or curl into his side after being intimate, but he could settle for this. Because no matter what time in her life it was, Lily would always be the most caring person he ever knew. And for that, he was thankful.

There came a knock at the door around noon. James had been filling Lily in, bit by bit, with what had happened in the past couple years. He perked up when he heard the knock.

"That's probably Remus." Lily chuckled and nodded. "Sirius is coming with Peter a bit later. I know… you were always closer with Remus in our school years, so I thought he should come first.

When he opened the door, James ushered Remus in. "Hey, Lily's really anxious about talking to you guys, worried she's going to disappoint you if she doesn't remember, I think. Just… be careful, okay?"

Remus nodded. "Yeah, of course. Do you want to be there when I talk to her?"

"Nah, I think I'm going to run some errands."

Remus smiled before walking into the kitchen, greeting Lily with a "Hey, Lily, how are you?"

James grinned to himself before exiting their apartment. He had work to do to prepare for tonight.

After Lily had seen the Marauders, who she had surprisingly hit it off with, James had led Lily into the living room with her sketchbook and some pencils, telling her he was working on a surprise.

At exactly seven o'clock, he retrieved her from the room.

"Come on into the kitchen," he ushered her. When they stepped through the threshold, Lily's face grew to an expression of surprise. A gourmet meal sat on the table, with candlesticks lit in the center of it all. Soft music played from an old record player set up on the counter.

"Here, these are for you," James said, handing her a dozen of roses.

"Wow… flowers from you two times in one week…" Lily gulped but James didn't seem to notice her discomfort.

"Here, sit down," he requested, pulling out a seat for her. She gently nodded and sat down, scooting her chair up.

James sat down at the other end and spooned some peas onto his plate as Lily cut herself a piece of steak.

"So… what's all this for?"

"Well, I just thought we should celebrate the fact that you're back!"

Lily nodded. "Nothing else?"

"Actually, I wanted to recreate our first date. I did the same thing, with the cheesy flowers and the candlelit dinner, except in the head's common room."

Lily bit her lip.

"Here, try some peas," he insisted, trying to salvage the dinner that didn't seem to be going over so well.

"No thank you, James."

"Please, just try them."

"I said no thank you!" she screamed, standing up from the table, her chair flying back.

"Lily, what are you doing? You're overreacting, you don't _have_ to eat the peas!"

"Don't you get it, James? Don't you understand that I'm not in love you with you? I don't want candlelit dinners or dozens of roses. I'm still trying to stomach the idea that we've kissed before, let alone gone further or said I love you."

James's eyes brimmed with unshed tears.

"I said I'd live with you because I want to regain my memory. I'm hoping that if I do, I can remember the insane reason I decided to be your girlfriend. I'm hoping I can find a loophole to _get out_ once I do because maybe I'll see the light. It makes me physically ill to think you got your way with me, that I gave into your little games."

James tried to blink back the tears in his eyes but they spilled over, running down his cheeks as he stared at Lily with an unreadable expression.

Lily opened her mouth, ready to throw back more of his heart at him when she noticed his expression and the tear tracks staining his cheeks. She clapped a hand over her mouth.

"Oh Merlin, James, no, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it, I'm so, so sorry. I just… I didn't know what to say and—"

He cut her off when he choked out, "I'm going to bed."

James blew out the candles, leaving them both in the dark, before parting with Lily. She was then alone in the room, with the dying roses on the counter and the uneaten dinner on the table.

* * *

**A/N: Again, so sorry for the last chapter. If you reviewed the last chapter, thank you so much ;D That was really awesome and I was surprised to see almost 10 reviews on the first chapter. Please, tell me what you think because I'm a little uneasy about this chapter! I'm going to try and reply to all the reviews left on this chapter! Also, if you favorite/alert, I would really appreciate a review so I know what you think. Thanks, lovelies )**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I'm really excited about this chapter. It's the first one where things are _really_ changing and it's pretty cool. I would like to warn you, however, that things get a little PG-13. Haha, I know that's not a problem for most people but I just thought I'd warn you. There are no actions but they do talk about sex so if that makes you uncomfortable, you can skip that part (it's not very influential on the story and you'll know what part I'm talking about giving the first line is "We've had sex.") Anyway, enjoy (: If you see any errors, please tell me! I woke up last night in the middle of the night with a bout of inspiration and couldn't _not_ write so I know there may be some grammatical, spelling, and 'what the f*** is that?' errors. Okay sorry for rambling, get on with the story.**

* * *

Things were tense, to say in the least. When James woke up, he walked into the kitchen to see Lily silently eating a bowl of cereal and reading the Daily Prophet. He didn't say anything to her, rather choosing to pour himself a bowl and look over the Evening Prophet from the night before.

After a few minutes, James finally coughed, making Lily turn away from the paper.

"James—"

"I don't want to talk about this right now. I have to go to an Order meeting at three and I might not be back until later. Feel free to eat whatever you want but if you leave the flat, bring your wand and be careful."

"I'm not a child," scoffed Lily.

"That's the thing, Lily. We _are_ both still children who have chosen to grow up much to fast. I advise you try to accept that as soon as possible."

James got up after this, placing his bowl in the sink and the Prophet on the table before getting ready for the meeting.

* * *

"Come on, let's go out!" begged Alice to the four Marauders. The meeting had run very late and it was now nine o'clock.

Sirius nodded. "Yeah, I agree with Alice!"

Alice smiled at him and he smiled widely right back.

Remus shook his head and said, "Nah, I don't think I can. I've got some things I need to do…"

"I'll come!" cried Peter.

"James?" asked Alice.

"Uh… Lily's home alone…"

Sirius grinned. "She'll be fine for a night. Just come out with us."

"…Oh, all right, fine. Sure you don't want to come, Moony?"

"No, you all go have fun without me."

Remus uneasily grinned at them before walking outside, where a 'pop' was heard. Peter screwed up his eyebrows.

"That was weird," he said, "Why wouldn't Moony come out with us? Don't you think something's a little…fishy with him?"

James laughed. "No, he's probably just tired. The full moon is in a few days."

"Yeah, but why would he come to the meeting if that was the case?"

"Because he's an honest guy and he made a commitment to come," argued James. Nonetheless, the seed of doubt was planted in James's brain.

"Stop fighting, let's just go."

And so they did.

* * *

"And then she yelled at me and told me she hated me," explained James in a slurred voice as Alice helped him up the steps to his apartment.

"I'm sorry, James, Lily just doesn't remember how she feels about you yet. She's such a stubborn person."

James nodded and stumbled up some more steps, finally reaching the door to his flat.

"Okay, here we are James."

James nodded. "Thanks, Alice. This was your idea and you were the one to stay sober!"

She chuckled. "It's no problem. Now get back in there, Lily's probably worried sick about you."

"No she's not."

Alice didn't argue.

"Do you have your key?"

"Yeah, right here," James replied, reaching into his pocket and plucking it out.

She patted him on the shoulder and released him, leaving him unsteadily standing on his own two feet. "Goodnight James."

When Alice leaned in to kiss him on the cheek, he suddenly turned his head and their lips meant, very briefly. Alice yanked back from James and he furrowed his brows.

"Lily," he murmured, before sliding a hand around Alice's waist and bringing her close to him to smash his lips into hers. He moved his lips softly and for a moment so did she. Then James felt two hands firmly on his shoulders, pushing him back.

"You are so pissed you think I'm Lily? James, I'm Alice and I'm with Frank. You need to stop."

James fell back against the door, his head pounding, and rubbed his temples. "Shit, what am I doing? Bloody hell, Alice, please don't tell Lily."

"As long as you promise to keep this from Frank. He will rip you limb by limb."

"Then you better keep Sirius a secret from him, too."

Alice's face contorted into a glare. "What the hell are you talking about?"

James stood up more firmly and pointed a finger as her. "You think I don't see the way you look at him? The way he looks at you? We all see it. Sirius has been pining over you for years and you've never discouraged him."

"Sirius flirts with everyone," retorted Alice.

"Yeah but it's different with you."

Alice snaps, "I'm not having this conversation with you. Not now, when your two kilometers passed drunk and not when you're sober either. All you need to know is that there's nothing going on."

"You wish there was!"

"Irrelevant!" cried Alice, throwing her hands in the air and sending him a bitch glare. Finally, James backed down, choosing to sigh deeply and turn from her. He opened the door and slipped in.

For the third night in a row, he slept alone on the couch.

* * *

"So, I think we need to set up some boundaries and rules if we are going to make this work."

James watched over the kitchen table as Lily almost choked on the oatmeal she was spooning into her mouth.

She coughed and spluttered out, "What?"

"Yeah. I think we both need a little refresher on amnesia etiquette."

Lily bit her lip. "I guess."

"Alrighty, I'll go first. No physical contact. I won't touch you without your consent. Does that work?" Lily nodded. "Okay, then I think rule number two should be No yelling. We need to work out our arguments like civilized adults."

Lily blushed and looked down at the table. "Sorry," she mumbled. She piped up though, and said, "No secrets. Just like you told me about Mary, I don't want you to keep anything from me because you think I can't handle it."

A pit grew in James's stomach as he thought about the night before. His head was still pounding from a hangover but he could remember the night crystal clear and that included the kiss.

"Right," he agreed, feeling guiltier by the second.

"Also, we do an 'every other night' with the bed. I'm sick and tired of seeing you limp around because that couch is hurting your back."

"No, Lily, I'm fine, don't worry about it—"

"James, I must insist. I'll be fine."

James surrendered, nodding lightly at her rule.

"Also, I want to start coming to order meetings."

A look of unease grew on James's face. "I don't know if that's such a good idea."

"And why not?" cried Lily. She then noticed her tone and lowered it, repeating, "And why not?"

"I don't want you to get hurt."

"I'm going to be fine!"

James paused."…I guess so, then."

Lily sat back with a smug look on her face.

"So… is that it?"

Lily nodded. "I think that will suffice. Also, my parents want to come over for dinner in a few days, to see how it's going. Is that alright?"

"Yeah, of course," said James with a nod, standing up to bring his dishes to the sink.

"Okay."

"Okay."

Lily smiled. "Okay, James."

He nodded goofily before walking away, back into the bedroom to get ready for the day.

* * *

Steam curled around James's head as he stepped from the tiny shower. He wrapped a towel around his waist and stretched, letting his muscles unwind to the heat flowing around him. He then pushed open the door, having forgotten to grab a pair of pants and a t-shirt before he entered the shower.

James expected the room to be empty. He didn't, however, expect to run into Lily, who screeched and threw up her hands, which splayed across his chest. She wobbled and James gripped her elbows tightly, making sure she didn't fall.

"Sorry," he apologized once she was steady, retracting his hands quickly. Lily was breathing heavily and looking at him with wide eyes, the same eyes from the kitchen the other day. He felt her trying to avert her gaze from his wet and quite naked chest.

"No, no, it's fine," she breathed out lightly, still not able to catch her breath.

"I just need to grab some clothes…"

Lily didn't move, her hands still lingering only millimeters from James's chest, and was still quite frozen to the spot. Finally, James watched as she blinked once and then twice. "Right. Right, I'll just…"

She sprinted from the room them, slamming the door on her way out. James chuckled and pursed his lips, nodding his head in a 'score!' motion. Maybe this wouldn't be as hard as he imagined.

* * *

It was late evening and Lily was perched on the couch, lightly sketching in her book. James approached her, having been working in the kitchen just moments before.

Lily looked up at him as he entered. "Sit," she commanded, patting the couch next to her. James nodded and smiled and slowly lowered himself to the seat.

"I… Will you tell me about our first kiss?"

James eyes widened and he started coughing, practically choking on his own spit at her question. "You want my to tell you about our snogging when you can't even stand the thought of it?"

"James," she said, hesitantly placing a hand over his, "I said those words out of anger. And while yes, if you had asked me when I first woke up what my thoughts on kissing you were, you would hear me tell you how gross I would find it. But now… now it's just a foreign thought. And I want to make it more.. ."

A lump grew in James's throat. Her sort of innocence and curiosity… well, it was turning him on, to be honest.

"Um… alright, sure. I'll tell you."

She nodded, signaling for him to go on.

"So, like I told you, our first date was in the head's common room. I set up all that stuff and serenaded you and everything. I got all the cheesy stuff out of the way. But that wasn't when we kissed. We kissed before that, actually. And you were in the one who initiated it, if you'll believe it."

"Possibly."

"So we were friends, of course. Friends with an unhealthy amount of sexual tension, as Sirius put it. Not only did we do head's business together, but we studied together and went to Hogsmeade together and I even taught you how to slow dance."

"You did not!"

"And may I add, you are a pretty terrible dancer."

"Shut up, Potter!" she cried jokingly. James couldn't hide the twinge the name gave him, however. "Sorry," she said, as an afterthought. "I was… I was just joking."

"I know, it just kinda hits a sore spot."

"Sorry," she repeated.

"Anyway, we were close. So one night, I'm just sitting there on the couch in the head's common room and you come storming up to me. You'd been pretty cold to me all week and I didn't have any idea why. I'd learned long ago to avoid you when you were in one of your moods. If I have the timeline correctly, you had recently broken up with that Andrews bloke."

"I dated Edward Andrews?"

"Good or bad thing?"

"Bad thing," Lily said with a definite nod.

"Low point in your life, I'm sure. It was only for a few weeks. To make me jealous, you later admitted."

Lily ignored what James was saying. "Anyway, go on…"

"So you just come storming up, all red in the face like you get and grab me by the collar and yank me up, so I'm standing." Lily then covered her face with her hands, obviously embarrassed by the self she didn't remember. "I just look at you and of course I have no idea what your about to do and you pull on my tie to heave me down to you and then snog the living daylights out of me."

"Please tell me you are joking."

"I am not."

"Oh, Merlin!"

"I'm not finished!"

"There's more?"

"Afraid so. So it takes me a minute to register what happens and I'm not kissing you back. You pull back from me and you seem angry as hell. You say, 'James Potter, if you don't kiss me back this moment, I will beat you to a bloody pulp, you big oaf'."

Lily was beyond flushed, instead: a flaming red that extended even passed her neck.

"And of course, when the girl who I've been in love with for the passed three years tells me to snog her back, what do I do? I snog her back."

Lily laughed, though it was quite nervously. "I can't believe I did that."

"You will always be the most courageous person I know."

"And the stupidest!"

"That too."

"Hey!" Lily cried, smacking James on the shoulder. A shiver ran through James's body where she touched him.

James rolled his eyes. "You were the one who suggested it."

"Doesn't mean you had to agree," pouted Lily. "You're supposed to love me."

"I do love you. My stupidly beautiful Lily."

Lily looked extremely uncomfortable and James knew he took it too far.

"I'm sorry," he said.

"No," Lily said, shaking her head. "When you say things like that… it just makes me remember this isn't all some joke to you. That's what I always thought it was, some big joke. It never really registered with me that you might have been serious all those times."

"At first, I'll admit I wasn't. But I did grow to love you Lily. Through all that fighting, I guess I just fell, hard and fast. Every time you turned me down… it killed me. It, figuratively, killed me."

Lily shook her head sadly. "I'm sorry James. I'm so bloody sorry for what I put you through."

"Merlin, why are you apologizing? I should have never have put you in that position. It was awful of me. I was a bully and a bloody wanker and I'm surprised you ever forgave me at all."

"Of course I did," stated Lily, simply. There was a pregnant pause before Lily asked, "What ever happened to Emily, that seventh year you were dating sixth year? You were dating her, last I remember."

"Emily," said James with a fond nod, "was a very sweet girl. She was also very honest. She broke up with me before the summer started. She told me she couldn't keep waiting for me."

"What do you mean, waiting?"

"She said she knew I was still in love with you and she would always come second. It was a sad but truthful way to end the relationship. I always felt bad for her but I couldn't love her, not while you were still around. Even if I didn't talk to you, you always held, and still hold, my heart."

Lily didn't reply for a moment. Finally, she said, "You better go check on dinner. You don't want it to burn."

"I don't burn my food."

Nonetheless, James left to go check on it, asking himself once again how he managed to screw everything up.

* * *

"We've had sex."

James's head snapped up from his plate, where his eyes were previously trained. Lily kept asking him these strangely inappropriate but (at the same time) appropriate questions.

"Yes," he replied as nonchalantly as possible.

"We took off all our clothes."

"True."

"You've seen me naked."

"Also true."

"I've seen you naked."

"Well, technically true but not really. You don't _remember_ seeing me naked." James couldn't believe they were talking about this so casually over his rice and chicken dinner.

"Correct. We've gotten naked and then I touched your—"

James stopped her, worried he might get a boner at the dinner table. That wouldn't be good. "I know how sex works, Lily. Remember, I'm not a virgin. I was there. You were but not really, because you don't remember."

"I'm not a virgin," Lily gasped out.

"Maybe… erm… maybe physically, but not mentally." God, James did _not_ want to talk about this. How could he steer the conversation away? Shit, someone really needed to write a handbook titled _What to do when you amnesic girlfriend brings up the fact that she doesn't remember the two of you had sex: a Guide. _Hm, maybe James could write it…

"Were you a virgin our first time?"

"No… I… I lost it in sixth year."

"To Emily?"

James nodded. Lily made a _harrumph_ noise.

"Was I?"

"Yes."

"Hm."

James didn't know what to say.

"And we've had it many times after that?"

"Well, yeah."

Lily didn't look uncomfortable. James didn't want to speak for her but she almost looked turned on. He decided not to bring it up.

"And I… enjoyed it, correct?"

"To the best of my knowledge, yes. You enjoyed it."

Lily seemed to ponder over the idea.

"I'm going out with Remus tomorrow, for lunch at…" James tuned out a bit, nodding and smiling at the right points, asking her if she liked the chicken. He guessed the topic was dropped. He wondered what made her bring it up. He didn't have the nerve to ask.

That night, he slept in their bed and it smelt of her. Infused in the pillows and the sheets, it was a scent that was purely Lily. It wasn't the same though, for however much it smelt like she was there, it didn't change the fact that there were no arms wrapped around him.

The bed was still cold, as it always was. The difference was that James had finally gotten used to it. He'd gotten used to the idea of being alone.

* * *

It had been five days since Lily came home. Five days without a wink of hope that her memories would return. Five days that her feelings seemed to have only changed slightly.

It was nighttime, after dinner, and both Lily and James had been out all day. James was curled up on the couch with Lily on the recliner, both of them with their noses buried in books. Every once in a while, one of them would make a noise of contentment before the comfortable silence would continue.

"I think I'm going to turn in," sighed Lily, when it was almost midnight. James looked up from his book.

"Okay, goodnight."

Lily stood up and walked over to couch where she perched herself next to him. Once again, James looked up from his book and to her, waiting for her to say something, to indicate the reasons she was still there and not in bed.

"Goodnight, James," she repeated, before hesitantly leaning in and pecking his cheek. James's body filled with electricity at the first sign of her lips touching his in months. His cheek burned with the imprint of her lips.

She then stood up, with her book in her hand.

James whispered, almost too low for her to hear, "I love you."

In the same tone and level of voice, she murmured, "I know."

* * *

"I want to take you out today," said James once Lily had climbed out of the shower and into her clothes.

"Out?" she asked, almost as if it was a foreign topic.

"Yes, out. Not like… not like a date or anything but just take you around Diagon Alley, show you what you've missed."

"I'd like that," Lily said with a grin.

"Can you be ready in five minutes?"

"I sure can. Meet you at the door then."

* * *

James took Lily around the shops, watching contently as she played with gadgets in Gambol and Japes Wizarding Jokes Shop and pursued the aisles of Flourish and Blotts for books. Though there was some argument, James ended up buying her some new books, knowing she would devour the ones in their home in just a few weeks.

They popped into the Daily Prophet's office for a bit to say hi to James's mates and to re-introduce Lily. He watched as she was tightly hugged by people she did not know in the least, his only solace for her being a smirk in her general direction.

Finishing off the day, they grabbed some ice cream from Florean Fortescue's Ice Cream Parlour. They sat on the tables outside the shops and slowly devoured their ice cream (chocolate and raspberry with chopped nuts for James and a simple vanilla with sprinkles for Lily).

"James! Lily!" called a distant voice and James turned around to see Emily of all people approaching them.

"Emily," said James happily, standing up to give her a quick squeeze when she reached them.

"Hullo, Emily," Lily said, smiling uneasily when she saw the older girl.

There was a bit of malice to Lily's voice, James noticed, but chose to ignore.

"Oh, have you two set the date yet? Or has it already happened? My, I'm so out of the loop I just have no idea!"

Lily quirked one eyebrow and James suddenly knew what Emily was talking about. James opened his mouth to speak but Lily beat him to the punch when she said, "What are you—"

"Oh, I'm sure you're wondering how I know. I work at one of the jewelry stalls, down in south Diagon Alley. We have a lovely selection of rings and that's where James bought his for you."

"Emily, you must not have heard, Lily was in—"

Emily glanced down at her watch, not hearing what James was saying, and interrupted him when she said, "Oh, I just have to go. I have a date at eight and if I don't hurry I'll be late. I'd love to catch up later though. Both of you! Send me an owl!"

She scurried off, in the opposite direction.

James didn't know what to say, so Lily spoke. "I'm guessing you were planning to propose."

"I was planning to do so the night you were in your accident."

"Merlin, James, I can't even—"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Oh, alright then, what do you want to talk about?"

"If you don't mind, I'd rather just go home. It's been a long, tiresome day and I'm about to crash."

"Wow," Lily said with a scathing tone, "I didn't know I was such a bother."

James sighed. "I didn't mean it like that."

"…I know."

They both looked at each other and apologies were not needed. They both just _knew_.

* * *

When they arrived home that night, Lily started making her bed on the couch as James reclined on the recliner, before suddenly stopping.

"I don't want to sleep on the couch tonight."

"Snapped after only one night? Wow, Miss Evans, I'm surprised. I thought you'd last longer than that."

Lily didn't take his sarcasm to heart like she had before and chuckled, shoving his shoulder as she did so. "Not like that, stupid. I just meant… it's kinda silly, for us both to be breaking out backs. It's a king-sized bed, it's big enough for the both of us. It won't hurt if we both sleep at opposite ends of the bed.

James heart raced at the suggestion and he dryly nodded before finally able to stutter out a, "Y-yes, that's fine."

"Alright then."

"Okay."

"Okay."

"Okay."

"Okay, _James_."

"Okay, _Lily._"

It was awkward, at first. They both got on opposite sides of the bed and climbed in. James made sure to stay glued to the edge, afraid any movement may make Lily uncomfortable. He laid on his back, staring up at the ceiling in a very unnatural sleeping position.

"I won't bite." Her voice broke the silence and broke James's hard exterior, allowing him to turn to his side and scoot closer to the center.

"You know how you're not supposed to touch me without my consent."

James didn't trust his voice, so he nodded into the dark. He then realized Lily couldn't see him. "Ye-eah."

"Well, you have my consent."

James couldn't keep his breathing even, now choking in and out for breaths. Slowly, ever so slowly, he inched toward the center of the bed, no-man's land, before coming in contact with Lily. His hand reached over and slowly positioned itself on her hip, her breath fanning across his face.

She made the next and biggest move, placing her hand up beneath his arm and on his shoulder and pulling herself to him, flush against his body. James was sure she could hear his heart beating through his thin t-shirt.

She buried her head in his chest and tangled her legs with his.

"Goodnight, James," she whispered into the open air.

Instead of responding, he placed a kiss on her forward before closing his sleep-ridden eyes and falling into a deep sleep.

It was the best he'd slept in months.

* * *

**A/N: So, finally James is making some progress. I'm thinking that we are about half-way to the finish, but I may decide to lengthen out this story. If you liked this chapter, I would love for you to review, I'll make sure to reply to them all. If you alert/favorite, _please_ review so I know what you think. You don't have to, but I'll give you the definite side-eye if you don't. Also, I'm going to NYC for a week so don't expect any updates for about a week and a half. One last thing, I'm hoping of going to see 'Potted Potter', an off-broadway Harry Potter Parody while I'm there. I don't have too much spending money and was wondering if any of you have seen it. If you have and have a reason why it is or isn't worth it, please message me on here, leave a review, or message me at one of my tumblrs (staganddoe or blurtanderson). While I don't believe it will be as good as a Harry Potter musical written by a bunch of drunken college kids, I do love anything that pokes fun at our favorite four-eyed hero! ONE LAST THING: Thank you to everyone who reviewed! You guys are the reason I'm still writing this and putting out updates (semi) fast.**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I'm so sorry that this has taken so long, I've been EXTREMELY busy. I started back school today and finished this late last night as I was trying to forget the fact that I had school the next day. Just so you know, I had huge bags under my eyes which probably didn't help, esp when I was sitting next to the cute new guy in my math class. ANYWAY, here this is! Sorry for any errors, I really didn't even edit this AT ALL so I'm sure there are a ton, but I just don't have time seeing I need to actually DO my homework (already procrastinating, you see) and beta a chapter for someone else. Please, let me now in reviews if you find any spelling or grammar issues. Please, be as nitpicky as you want. Also, PLEASE read the author's note at the bottom of the chapter!**

* * *

James wasn't quite sure what was going on. First, Lily offered to sleep in the same bed with him. Now, she was slowly shaking him awake and offering him a cup of tea, practically the only thing she knew how to make.  
"James," she said with a smile, "James, I made you tea."  
James rubbed at his eyes with the back of his hands, trying to wake himself up. He sat up and looked at her, his eyes bugging out of his head when he saw it actually was Lily and not a dream. She was actually there, holding a cup of tea out to him and smiling like the sun shined just for him.  
"Uh…" he mumbled, "Thanks." He curled and uncurled his hands a few times before taking the mug in his hands and sipping slowly, hissing at the sickly-sweet sugar, milk, and luke-warmness of it all.  
Lily's face fell. "You don't like it?"  
"No!" he practically shouted, "I do." Trying to prove his point, he brought it up to his lips and took and sip, trying not to grimace as it slid across his tongue and down his throat. His plan obviously backfired as Lily saw the look and brought her hands up to hide her red face.  
"Shit," she mumbled into her palms, "I'm so sorry James. I… I didn't know how you liked it so I just made it how I made mine."  
"This is what you liked it? Back in 6th year? Or now, I guess." The Lily he knew liked it scalding hot, like him, with a bit of cream and one sugar cube. Just added to the list of things he didn't know about her.  
"Yeah, that's how I like it. Here give it to me, I'll drink it, and I'll make you a new cup. How do you want it?"  
He shook his head. "No, Lily, seriously, I'm fine. I can make it myself."  
Lily rolled her eyes. "I told you before James, I'm not a child and you can't keep treating me like one. There's an unspoken code, James, written in Amnesiac Girlfriends 101 that says I just must make you tea at least one a week." She lifted her hand and placed on his arm. He almost chocked on his own spit when he felt it, burning against his arm and drawing light circles. "I can make you some tea while you shower. Now, how do you like it?"  
Trying to keep his cool, he muttered out, "V-very hot with…uh… two sugars."  
"Nothing else?" she said, twisting her face up together and tilting her head to the side.  
"Nope, that's it."  
"All right…" she said. With a dazzling grin and a flounce in her step, she left, leaving James wondering who the hell that was.  
James hopped up and entered the shower, washing his hair and body, before stepping out. He shaved and brushed his teeth before remembering what today was. It's been a week he realized, a week since I took her home. James felt a pit in his stomach at the fact that she still didn't remember.

* * *

"Here you are!" she said cheerily, reaching over to place a steaming cup of tea in front of him as he sat down at the table. "And here is your paper."  
"Thanks, Lils—erm…Lily."  
She smirked at his misstep. He glared playfully.  
"You seem like you're in a really good mood," he replied.  
"I am. It's been a week, right? That's gotta be good luck. I have a really good feeling I'm going to remember today."  
James felt uneasy. He didn't want to promise her anything.  
"You have a doctor's appointment today," he reminded her.  
She nodded. "Yes, at three. Would you like to come?"  
"Of course," he cried, thrilled that she asked him. "I would love to."  
He walked over to their calendar on the fridge and scanned today's date. "I was thinking we could call Bea today before we leave and invite her over for dinner."  
"Bea?" she asked.  
"Your boss. From the coffee shop. She was like a second mother to you, and I know she misses you a ton."  
Lily bit her lip.  
"If it would make you uncomfortable, we don't have to."  
"No," she replied after a moment, "I would like to see her. Immerse myself a bit more in my previous, before-the-accident life. You'll be here the whole time, correct?"  
James chuckled and nodded.  
"Alright then, it's a plan. This might be too much, but could we have my parents and sister over tomorrow night? They really want to visit and see me and I feel bad it's been a week."  
"Sounds fine to me. I'll call Bea and then your parents. Unless you want to do it."  
"No, you can. Thanks James," she said, taking one last sip of her tea before placing it in the sink, walking over to James, and giving him a kiss on the cheek. His eyes bulged from his head and his jaw dropped as he felt her lips ghosting across his cheek.  
"No problem," he breathed out.  
"I'm going to go take a shower."  
He nodded, completely dumbfounded.  
He sat there for a moment, once she had left, before regaining his train of thought and motor skills. He hopped up and grabbed the phone, calling Bea quickly and asking her to come. Next, he called the Evans' home.  
"Hello, this is Mary speaking."  
"Mary, this is James."  
"Oh, hello James, how are you, darling?"  
James smiled. "I'm going just fine."  
"And Lily? Has she… has she remembered anything?"  
James shook his head before realizing that she couldn't see him. "No," he replied, "Nothing."  
"I'm sorry, James."  
"You have no need to apologize, this is just how life is sometimes."  
"It doesn't mean it's fair."  
"Life isn't, though."  
"It doesn't make it hurt any less, though."  
"Pain comes with the job description of life."  
"That it does," she breathed out.  
There was a beat. "So, I'm guessing you know I didn't just call to discuss pain and it's demands. I was wondering if you, Mr. Evans, and Petunia would like to come to dinner tomorrow night."  
"Bill and I can, but I'm unsure about Petunia. I think she has dinner tomorrow with Vernon."  
James paused and, though knowing he would regret it later, said, "Vernon is invited too, of course."  
"James…" she started. "You know I mean no offense when I say that it might not be the best idea to have all six of us in one room."  
"You know I wouldn't mistake your warning. I understand completely. You and Bill are invited for the evening and, if Petunia's plans are cancelled or whatnot, please give us a call."  
"You know I will."  
"See you tomorrow?"  
"Yes, see you tomorrow. Goodbye James."  
"Goodbye."  
And with that, James hung up the phone.

* * *

"James," called a voice from the bedroom.  
"Yes?"  
A various mumbled words were heard through the door, but James couldn't make them out.  
"What?" he called.  
Again, the words were lost through the wooden door.  
Suddenly, the door to the bedroom swung open and Lily marched out. Lily marched out in only a towel, her wet hair draped around her shoulder and dripping water down her back and neck.  
His mind blanked and he watched her mouth move but didn't hear the words.  
"James!" she practically screamed. "Where. do. I. keep. my. lotion?" she asked, enunciating every word.  
"Uh… in the cabinets in the bathroom, I think," he replied, trying to keep his eyes on hers.  
"I checked," she replied, "It's not there. God, I hate not knowing where I keep my stuff."  
James almost rolled his eyes before walking over to the kitchen counter, where he'd last left his wand. "Accio lotion!" he called out, watching as the lotion flew through the open door and into his waiting hand.  
"Here you go."  
Lily furrowed her brow. "I have barely used any magic since I've been here! I can't even… wait, James, I missed seventh year. I bloody missed seventh year! I didn't take any of my NEWTs! Well, I did, I just don't remember them. Please, please don't tell me I flunked! Please tell me I did well and got—"  
"LILY!" James shouted overtop of her, effectively cutting her off. "You're going to remember, so there's no point in worrying. If you really want, I still have some of my seventh year textbooks for you to look over. You did wonderful on your owls, I'm sure you still have the report somewhere around here.  
"And I'm sure you haven't been using magic only because you've been so distracted by everything else."  
"Yes," she said, nodding, "But you also haven't been using it."  
"Part of it's distraction too, I guess, but when we moved here, we made a pact to each other to stop relying on it as much. We did most of the cooking and cleaning without it, even walking and taking the tube to some places. You worked a muggle job and I usually only used magic when necessary at my job."  
She pondered it for a moment. "I see it now," she whispered.  
"See what?" he asked in confusion.  
"I see why I fell in love with you."

* * *

"Okay, Lily, looks like everything is going pretty well."  
James watched as Lily beamed at his words.  
"When am I going to remember, then? Soon, maybe?"  
Dr. Clarke's eye shifted to the side. James felt a large lump form in his throat at the sight of it.  
"Lily, could I speak with you alone?"  
Lily's eyes shifted to James in a panic.  
"I'll be right out there," he said with a smile, wanting to lean down and kiss her on the cheek but remembering the 'no touching' rule as he started to. He straightened back up, sent her a grin, and left the room, his fingers twitching nervously at his side when he thought of what Lily was talking about with Dr. Clarke.  
As James waited, he pondered Lily. How she was different and how she was the same. She still wrung her hands when she was nervous and bit her lip in the same, adorable way. Other things were different though, like her general demeanor being so much more closed. Along with that was the more noticeable things, like her taste in tea or the style of her art. It was a bit discouraging, but he knew she was the same. She was still his Lily, no matter how she liked her tea or how open she was with him. In time, he was sure she would see that.  
It was about ten minutes before Lily exited, waving to Dr. Clarke as she left.  
"Hey, James," she greeted, putting a hand on James' shoulder and pulling him out of his reverie.  
"Lily," he replied, giving a nod in Dr. Clarke's direction in thank you.  
"So…" she trailed off, "I was thinking that maybe we could go grab some lunch and maybe walk around a bit before going back and starting on dinner.  
"I think that sounds lovely," James said, unable to stop happiness from spreading through him, boiling at his fingertips and radiating from his skin.

* * *

All through lunch, James watched her. Her watched the way her eyes lit up when she started talking about her mum's vegetable garden and did he think they could ask her mum to bring over a few fresh tomatoes? He watched as the skin beside her eyes crinkled in laughter when he told a joke he heard from serious the other night. He noticed her freckles and how they seemed to have lost their zeal when they were in the hospital, but they were slowly gaining color again.  
James saw her long fingers and how they twisted around her glass and how her rosy lips tightened around her straw when she drank the cool lemonade. He watched how she pulled her shawl around her shoulders a bit tighter when a gust of air conditioning blew through the café. He noticed her fingers running through her long, red, and wavy hair, pulling out the tangles almost by habit.  
He watched her and he saw the girl who he loved. He saw her in all her actions and he knew he hadn't lost anything. He hadn't lost a damn thing in that accident. He'd actually gained something: the chance to fall in love with Lily Evans all over again.  
God, it almost seemed worth it. Getting to know her again, explaining their love to her. It hurt, but in a good way. Definitely a good way.

* * *

"Oh, let's go in there!" Lily cried, pointing a record store from across the way. James gulped but nodded at her. Lily grabbed his hand and sparks shot up his arm. She looked both ways before dragging him across the street and pulling him into the small shop.  
She didn't let go of his hand. He didn't either. They strolled around, hands encased in one another's as they browsed the shop, looking at the brand new records and the second hand ones.  
Lily let go of his hand to start flipping through some albums, so James did the same. They were silent for a few minutes, as was the empty shop, the sound of the radio the only thing filling the empty space.  
James watched as Lily stopped in her tracks when the song changed, looking towards the radio perched on the front desk, turned up all the way. James waited, he waited for her to clap her hands or sing along.  
And… she did just that,  
"I love this song!" she cried out, "It's one of my favorites of all time."  
James smiled. "I know."  
Her smile widened. "So it hadn't changed? Future Lily still loved this song?"  
James nodded. "I wasn't sure if it would be the same though. The song or the band."  
"The Beatles will always be my favorite, no question."  
"I'm glad to hear it," replied James.  
Lily held out her hand. "Dance with me?"  
His eyes lit up at the offer. "Why yes, my lady."  
Lily giggled and thread her arms around James' neck. He placed his hands on her hips as she laid her head on his chest. They slowly swayed back and forth as the song went on.  
_"And when the broken hearted people living in the world agree/ There will be an answer, let it be/ For though they may be parted, there is still a chance that they will see/ There will be an answer, let it be."_  
James was astounded. He was so in love. He didn't think anything could break that moment.  
He didn't, that was, until the entire reason he had been so uneasy to enter the shop in the first place arrived, walking from the backroom with a cardboard box of records in his hands.  
Hearing the noise of another, Lily jolted from her place in his arms, looking flushed and caught doing something she's not supposed to be. The boy looked from atop the box to see the two standing there, arms hanging limp and eyes averted.  
"Lily?" called the voice.  
James turned and tried to hide his grimace.  
"Edward!" exclaimed Lily, looking slightly uncomfortable but joyful none-the-less. He pulled her into a hug as James watched from the sidelines, trying to keep the green monster on his back hidden from Lily.  
When she pulled back from an unusually long hug, Andrews turned to him. "Potter," he said with a nod.  
"Andrews."  
Edward turned back to Lily. "I heard you were in an accident, an automobile or something, right?" Lily nodded, averting her eyes toward the ground. "I sent flowers over when I heard about the coma and knew you had woken up, but never got around to sending an owl. How are you?"  
"I'm… better than I was," she laughed uneasily. She seemed awkward and tense, before James remembered she had to be told she had even dated the bloke. If James could remember, they had been semi-good friends in sixth year, so he couldn't imagine how awkward she must be feeling.  
"I ran into Alice the other day, in Diagon Alley, and she said your memory was messed up?"  
James felt rude, like he was eavesdropping, but he also felt the mean glares Andrews was sending him and he didn't want to leave Lily alone with him. He decided to hover to the left of Lily, keeping one arm close to her.  
"Yeah, the accident really uh… knocked it out of me. Can't remember anything past sixth year."  
"You're kidding!" he exclaimed, his eyes bulging so much James could see the wheels turning and the gears working.  
Lily shook her head.  
Andrews cocked his head to the side. "Wait, but that means… You don't remember we dated! That's a hoot." Lily chuckled. "That also means you don't remember dating him," he said with a point toward James' direction.  
"Yeah, well, as a friend, he's really been helping me out—"  
"I remember this one time, when he asked you out in front of the entire school and you said. What did you say again Lily? You said, "I wouldn't go out with you—"  
"That's enough, Andrews," growled James, worried he was going to ruin everything he had worked toward. Everything he had done trying to make this work.  
"Whoa Potter, take it easy," Andrews said, throwing his hands up as if he was the innocent and non-provoking one. "I'm just having conversation. And from what it seems, you two aren't even together."  
"So what if we aren't? Doesn't mean I'm any less in love with her. I'm not going to just give her up that easy to _you_, the bloke she only dated because she wanted to make me jealous!"  
"Oh, don't get me started on that. She only _said_ that so she didn't have to be humiliated that she caught me cheating with Amanda Collins."  
"That's a load of crap and you _know_ it. Anyway, why would she want to go out again with someone who cheated on her with Amanda Collins?"  
"Shut the bloody hell _up!_" cried Lily from where she was standing, her brow furrowed and her jaw clenched. "I'm not some sort of _prize_ for you two to fight over and I'm not going to just stand here while the two of you make fools of yourselves! Goodness, have both of you lost your common sense with age? Or have you ever had any?! Come on, James, we are leaving. It was lovely seeing you, Edward, send me an owl if you want to catch up sometime over lunch _between two friends_."  
With a harrumph, Lily stormed out of the shop, James following behind in the wake of her rage. Once he exited, Lily grabbed his hand and yanked him down the street next to her, practically running away from the shop.  
"The most bloody annoying bloke I've ever met in my life," she mumbled under her breath.  
"Who? Me?!" asked James.  
"No," she said with a roll of the eyes, "Edward. I don't think the boy knows when he's lost, when it's over." Lily then muttered something intelligible under her breath.  
"What was that?" asked James.  
"Nothing."  
"What?"  
She paused and took a breath, before blurting out, "I said, it would have been a lot more effective argument if you had just kissed me."  
James' jaw dropped. "WHAT?! Y-you want to kiss me?"  
"Any feelings I may or may not have are beside the point, I was just pointing out it would have been a lot more successful argument if you had just kissed me to prove… something. Your argument."  
James gulped. The fact that Lily sorta—maybe or maybe not—wanted to kiss him sent blood rushing through his veins.  
"Oh," he managed to get out. "Y-yeah, you're ri… you're right."  
"Of course I am," she said with a laugh, "I'm Lily Evans."  
"Whose the arrogant one now? I've deflated my head, seems you need some of my tricks."  
"Shut up," she laughed, "you love me."  
"That I do," he blurted out before he could take it back. She stopped and dropped his hand. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that."  
She shook her head. "No… I guess it's just, whenever you used to talk about how madly you were in love with me, I didn't believe it. I couldn't, I wouldn't. Now… now it's more believable."  
"It's more believable because it's true."  
"You love her. You don't love me."  
James looked toward the ground and shook his head. "I love her, I love you, I love the same person. Maybe at different times in her—your life, but you all the same. I'm sorry if it makes you uneasy."  
Déjà vu coursed through him when she shook her head at him. "No, it doesn't. It's nice." And with a smile and the bite of a lip, she grabbed his hand again, winked, and disapparated with him along.

* * *

They stopped by the grocery store on the way home to grab groceries before stepping in their house, James ready to make dinner. He wasn't exactly sure wht he was going to make, but winging-it usually worked out for him.  
"I want to help," Lily claimed, setting down one of the bag on the kitchen table with a hopeful look on her face. James hated to turn her down but…  
He chuckled. "Lily, I know you do, but believe me when I say it will do more harm then good."  
Lily pouted and James heart started to pound more. After another moment of silence, he gave in. Saying, "Fine, you can cut the vegetables and be my taste tester. Is that okay?"  
"Perfect," she said with a dazzling smile.  
They worked for a little bit in mostly silence, the record player playing absentmindedly in the background. The music weaved through the air and James felt himself tapping along, smiling when a familiar song came on.  
"We never actually finished our dance," Lily said with a smirk. James smiled.  
"Only a quick one, I don't want anything to burn."  
"Like you said, you don't burn your food."  
James flashed her a smirk before wrapping her in his arms in one move and starting to sway. She placed her head on his chest and he inhaled the sent of her. He inhaled her beautiful red mane and her lavender perfume and her strawberry shaving cream and the whole unidentifiable scent that was completely _Lily_. The scent he smelled exactly when he smelled amortentia in potions just a year before. The exact moment he knew he couldn't live without the wonderful, beautiful girl-not-yet-woman in front of him.  
She tilted her head up at the same time she tilted hers down. The music had stopped and so had their dancing but they didn't dare move from the position they were in. Lily's lips were only a breath away, so close that James could taste them. He knew them, he knew there taking ways and it made them all the more seductive. All the more dangerous.  
He could see Lily's nerves, knowing at that time in sixth year she had only kissed a few guys, most on dares or games of spin-the-bottle. The thought made him sick. He couldn't do this, he couldn't take advantage of her. _She _would have to be the one to make the first move.  
She fluttered her eye lashes at him, towering almost sky high, and stared up at him, waiting for him to do something he couldn't.  
Suddenly, the doorbell rang. _Saved by the bell_ he thought.  
"To be continued," she whispered in this trying to be sexy but endearingly adorable whisper, before flouncing off to the door to greet and let be in. James rocked back on his heels and breathed in deeply, letting the air fill his lungs and help blood to his brain.  
Damn, he thought, this girl was going to be the absolute death of him.

* * *

**A/N: So, I'm going to try to crank out the next chapter as soon as I get my laptop issued for school (seeing as I hate writing on my family computer and don't have one of my own), but I don't get that until next week. Anywho, I only ever planned for this story to be five chapters, with MAYBE an epilogue, but it's stretching out longer than I expected (maybe 6-8 chapters + an epilogue). I've also mused over the idea to writing a five or six chapter PREQUEL about James and Lily in this same universe, but how they got together at Hogwarts. Please, tell me in your review (if you leave one) what you would prefer. Either... a) this story to be 5 chapters + prequel or b) this story to have 6-8 chapters + an epilogue. I could do both, which is option c) but I don't know how long it would take before both finished products were completed. Okay, well please leave your answer in your reviews and remember, I would really appreciate no one favoriting or alerting this story without a review, but I can't stop you from doing what you want. (Just know you will be getting a bit of a bitch glare from me kthanksbye).**


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